Thursday, November 8, 2007

Feeling Crappy

I'm not sure if it's BECAUSE I'm eating more cooked food, or I'm eating more cooked food BECAUSE I feel crappy...I'm sure it doesn't even matter...I'm just feeling bad and eating cooked food, to boot.


Even Raw Model or Raw Reform don't seem to help.I'm having a rough go of lots of things at once, and my food is usually the first to go downhill. Sugar, chocolate, wheat, dairy, cooked, you name it. Of course it's not TOO bad, but it doesn't mean it's good for me to eat poorly. I see several raw peeps eating yummy things and I don't know why I can't do it too!

Last year was when I started to eat more than I had in many moons. Being at work, surrounded by everyone's baked things made me weak. So weak that I had to attend some OA meetings to give me some help. I'm still eating a lot, but I'm not eating as badly...which is a point for me. :)

So now that the holidays are rolling around I need to get better about staying raw. I don't limit my food, but even then I need to know that I can prepare raw snacks and meals that are satisfying so that I'm not looking longingly at my housemate's wheat-free, sugar-free cookies (I try to eat the kind of cooked food that won't make me feel too much worse). Dinner time is getting tough because it's cold and I need to get into my dehydrator more. Literally. Nah, I should just make heavier food, is all.

My emotions have been through the ringer this week. I have felt more depressed than I have in months. I want to eat sugar and wheat when I am depressed. I don't even make time for raw treats. How can I plan for depression?

In any case, it's really awful when stores don't carry raw food, I've decided. I hate going to our co-op because nothing in the deli is even raw! What's up with that? So I don't go out too much these days and I am searching for good, warming and fattening food. Even three layers of cold isn't enough for me.

Any suggestions???