The Urge to Lead

As I was getting ready for work, sun already shining bright, I had an idea about getting together people I knew who were interested in leadership. Whether that was within their community or a larger community didn't matter. I simply wanted to start hanging out with inspiring people who are making a difference in the world.

Wha-what??! Who is this person? I don't know if it's the clarity or the sunshine or what, but I haven't felt this motivated in a long time. I really enjoy community efforts and get-togethers and collaboration and maybe that's just what I'm supposed to move toward.

I enjoy leading. I have always had a bit of hesitancy because being a leader means that people look to you and I don't like being wrong, so I don't want to lead people astray. But I also know that I have a lot of passion and good energy and when I don't lead, I feel some disappointment. I know that if I could do anything without fear of failure, leading others would be top of the list. Not because I am egotistical, but because I don't like to wait to implement a good idea. I go to community events and promote good causes and feel passionately about a lot of things but when it comes time to lead, I fade into the background and hope no one asks me to volunteer. It's a shame and I really ought to ignore my fear of failure and move into any leadership role I can.

My creativity has also been flowing very easily and it's great to feel that again. When was the last time...art school? Yikes.

A few times that I have wanted to lead or at least motivate, I have felt self-conscious and a few misguided comments made me back away from it. How can I lead without making it into the Becca Show? I believe that God has given me leadership qualities, but they feel a bit rough around the edges. I suppose they won't get refined stuck in a drawer somewhere. How can I learn what to change if I can't see it outside my own mind? Good point. I believe that I'll be guided to the best path.

I heard on a podcast that you are who you spend your time with. Look at the closest five people to you and you can see yourself. I like that. Just like eating raw food makes me crave more raw food, hanging out with inspiring people makes me crave more inspiring people. It's a good cycle.